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This episode is amazing. I've been hearing for awhile that a lot of the LN fans hope White Fox would do a 1:1 adaptation because this was the defining moment that they wholly devoted themselves at a LN reader of the series and I was hyped for it.
Was not disappointed at all.
Just wow. Where to start? Subaru giving up was just so painful to watch, but we as the audience cannot chide him or blame him. He's literally done his best by himself to fix things to avoid seeing everyone he cared about get brutally killed or worst. However, nothing worked no matter how many times Subaru struggled to reach a happy ending, his wish could not be granted. As he Rem saw, Subaru is tired, and Subaru accepts it as well. He doesn't want to keep getting hurt and seeing those he loves get hurt. He's weak, small, and pathetic and he doesn't want to accept it because it he himself doesn't want to confirm it. He want to change the future, but he cannot accept himself as the way he is. All the things he's done up till now, Subaru doesn't want to be meaningless.
So instead Subaru tries to grasp the smallest things in order to be happy. To run away with Rem and start all over. He sees himself now as someone who is powerless and unable to change anything so he wants to at least find some happiness in this new world. It's the only thing he has left and Rem is the only person left who can turn to. However, Rem has thought about this more than Subaru ever has and it was something she secretly desired as well. But she would not bend on this matter, because the person Subaru is right now is not the person she loved. To kill her own small wish, she goes to support Subaru to be the hero she admired. Subaru, the hero who saved her and restarted her frozen time, to a brighter future she couldn't have possibly imagined before.
However, Subaru sees nothing about the man she admires in him. All his past failures in this arc only highlight his worst qualities. Petty, arrogant, shameless, weak, and a coward, these are all the things Subaru admits as who he is. He hasn't done anything ever since he got transported to this world to allow himself to wish for a happy ending. He has not changed. In his past life still in Japan, he has not done anything living as a NEET. He's ashamed of how he has acted, how he has lived his life, and Subaru hates himself He's wishing for something that he did not deserve, he's consoled himself and tried to justify it saying he's done everything he could, but he was lying to himself. He's pretended to do something, to get stronger, but he recognized just as Wilheim did, he isn't doing it to change himself. Subaru was merely going through the motions to feel better about himself.
Giving up is easy. Even if it is cruel to say to Subaru of all people, but Rem is right. As long as he is alive, giving up is easy, but to change is hard Rem shows him that everything he has done isn't meaningless and that Rem is here with him because of who Subaru is. Even if he can only see the worst things bout himself, he has done some good things. His dreams and wishes are what make him who he is, and if he hates himself then he should change. Even if he is alone, she will be with him as she always has. If things become to heavy to carry by himself, Rem is willing to share his burdens. She wants to see the future Subaru will create where everyone can laugh and smile happily.
10/10 episode. Perfect setup and ultimately culmination of Subaru's ordeal to this point. They absolutely nailed it. The seiyuus, the animation, the direction, the music all coalesced into this one penultimate episode. The king of starting from zero. Definitely anime of the year for me.
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